Beowulf. This
book, or rather EPIC poem is the most testosterone filled poem I have ever
read. After I read through it, I had
grown a full beard, biceps, and an extreme urge to punch something then eat red
meat…RAW. Seriously, this slick mother
just doesn’t let down. I’m fairly sure
that Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris are distant relatives of Beowulf. This man (Beowulf) actually, you know what,
stop it, stop it right now. CAN WE
PLEASE DISCUSS THIS BAD*** NAME?! He has
“wolf” in his name! Anyways, this man
travels, probably thousands of miles just to help out another kingdom in which
he really has no obligations to. He is
just that kind. Nah he doesn’t need strong
weapons against fugly Grendel, he’ll just use his hands like a man. Oh no, Grendel’s mom lives at the bottom of a
lake! No problem, I’ll just uh, SWIM FOR
AN ENTIRE DAY. No deal beat that one
David Blaine, world record for holding your breath, PSH. This man has the strength and stamina of a
million horses, or five hundred thousand giraffes, or nine hundred and fifty
thousand ostriches. Not only that, like
I said, this dude is kind as heck. He
could have easily ascended the Geatish throne, but naw he’ll let the rightful prince,
Beowulf will just advise him, because he is awesome. Prince is dead, alright, I’ll give the Geat
kingdom THE MOST PEACE TIME THEY’VE EVER HAD.
Hey go fight tha dragon, alright no qualms even though I had a
premonition of my own death. Hey Wiglaf,
I know I’m dying and all, but uh build me a monument and I want it to say “I’m
awesome.” Ok ok, so I paraphrased a bit…but
seriously, Beowulf is the only man who asks in death to have a monument built
to himself and doesn’t come off as a jerk.
Wiglaf was probably honored to be so close to Beowulf. This poem was amazing. The insanely detailed battle scenes, with the
arm rip-off, and the giant’s sword. It
was very hard to put down. It could have
very easily descended into what I like to call, “The Michael Bay Circle.” To qualify, you must have no real plot,
terrible dialogue, and un-likable characters.
Beowulf, although short was intense and had a great plot with twists
such as when he declined the throne and when he died so suddenly. The dialogue was great also with the intricate
songs sung by the various bards and the heroic speeches Beowulf gave, and c’mon,
HOW IS HE NOT LIKABLE?? He is kind as heck, giving his personal treasures from
Heorot to the Hygelac king and queen, just because. He kept the peace in the land of the Geats,
he could have easily starting wars, conquering Europe, but no, he cares about
his people. He is what every man wishes he could be. I
really wish I could read the old English so that I could read the original
Beowulf. I’m sure Seamus Heaney did an
amazing job translating, but I would really like to read it for myself. Maybe one day…
I have decided to appease your desire for inner-Blogger dialogue with a comment.
ReplyDeleteFirstly, I am not entirely sure whether you are being sincere throughout the entire post. At times, your tone sounds very sarcastic ("...great plot twists such as when he declined the throne and when he dies so suddenly"). Perhaps I just do not perceive any plot twists through the poem. Though, it is quite possible I did not enjoy Beowulf as much as you did.
You spend a lot of time glorifying Beowulf himself, which I understand. Beowulf may be seen as a hero on par with Odysseus, or Hercules, or Luke Skywalker. Beowulf is a personification of the morals and values which were esteemed to among the Anglo-Saxons. That is likely why he is portrayed as such a "bad mother", as the kids say it, throughout the work.
Also, nice background.
Josh, I'm not sure I agree with the Luke Skywalker part, though I think Odysseus and Hercules are good parallels. Luke is very much cast in the innocent Percival-esque mode, and I don't think Beowulf is ever depicted as the inexperienced you hero...
DeleteBryce, I agree with Josh that I'm not sure about tone here. It does sound as though you appreciate Beowulf, for his Alpha-male heroic attributes.
ReplyDeleteI think shouty capitals can be problematic, tone-wise. Perhaps use them a bit more sparingly!
Why, beyond his macho-ness, do you think Beowulf resonates so much with you as a character?
I actually am being serious! My shouty capitals did get your attention however which did get you to read my post and comment thus allowing a nice conversation and reader traffic. I really wasn't being sarcastic, I did not mean for it to come off that way. Beowulf resonates with me because he is pretty dang flat. Which is good, he may not have much depth as a person but he has no flaws and can be a good moral standard. Beowulf is everything I want in an action hero, just a light entertaining breeze. I mean seriously, enough with the deeply emotional and dark Christopher Nolan super heroes, where Batman is more of a pansy who needs more a therapist than gadgets. I miss the old days of a true kick ass super hero where thats all you read. The old Batman comics were awesome! just episodic "jaunts" through the masked vigilante to provide some entertainment form the outside world. I get enough angst and emotion from the real world, I do not need more from Nolan and Bale. This again relates to why I like Beowulf, he is an old fashioned superhero, a Dirty Harry (superhero is used loosly, an old Spiderman, and old Batman. Although having said this it is interesting that one of my favorite heroes is Tyler Durden...
ReplyDelete